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My cats are trying to give me a heart attack
so I got these 3 cats,they are pretty good cats...they use the litter,don't make a mess when they eat and yes they leave cats hair around...but got to expect that..great hunters..keeps the garden free of shrews and field mice...sooooo tonight I was going around picking up their newest deposits of hair clumps, bent down to grab one up in the porch and immediately dropped it as it felt strange,thought it was a litter accident...gross.....but alas it was not,it was a DEAD SHREW brought in to me as a gift I am guessing...not cool cats...NOT COOL!!!!
so all day I have been having an issue with the bottom of my foot...felt numb. Now I have nerve damage in both feet and just thought it was a flare up..great!!....so a little while ago I figured I would soak my feet before they got to bad,took off my sock and what do you think was wrong??..a Breath Right Nasal Strip was stuck to the bottom of my foot....happy it's not a flare up, but imagine if I went to the doctors about it...I am always on the verge of getting locked up for a "Rest"
So I went in yesterday to get my license renewed and had to get a new picture taken, dear lord.....so he told me to sit down, take off my glasses and look at the blue light..problem...couldn't see any blue light without glasses and I have an extremely lazy eye....don't smile either,ok?..so he hands my my new license...well I got 1 eye staring at the floor while the other special 1 is checking out the waiting area to my left.....if I ever gets stopped I will immediately be arrested for escaping the Waterford....I signed my organ donor card as well, but when that day comes hopefully they won't be using my eyes cause some poor soul will be chasing their arse like a dog chasing it's tail...but on the bright side my hair looks really shiny
Recently, while at a large grocery store, my brother was waiting to be checked in. Suddenly there was an extremely loud bang and the look on people's faces including his own was unbelievable. When he came to find out, a large metal cabinet had toppled over and had hit the concrete floor! All were relieved but the effects of our modern society had struck home.
My daughter was only around 4 when she came through the back door crying and in distress. I asked what was going on and she replied that she has encountered a large spider. The lessen her grief as best I could I asked her how many legs the spider had.She responded that the spider had as many legs as a spider should have. That made us all laugh as well as her.The grief was over.....
The things children say!
Sierra, my granddaughter, who had just started school, was drawing a picture at my home. I asked her what she was doing and she replied, "Drawing a bee hive." She was doing it quite well, and interested in seeing how she would draw a bee, I said, "ÂWhere are the bees?" "Oh you can'Ât see them, they are in the bee hive," she answered.
The things children say!
Aiden, my grandson, who was four years old at the time, was playing with his toys on the living room floor. I said to him, "ÃÂI think you look like your grandfather Sadler."ÃÂ To which he replied, "No, I don't." "Then you must look like your daddy,"ÃÂ I said. Again, he replied, "ÃÂNo, I don't." "Well, who do you look like?" I asked. He learned forward on his hands and said in a loud voice and with a big smile, "ÃÂMe!"
What's your idea of winter fun?
When I was a pre-teenager, I loved to play "shinny." When the marsh near our school flooded, the boys would clear off the snow and make a great rink. When our team won one afternoon, I decided to take our lucky puck home (to use for another game). During our family supper, everyone smelled this terrible odour. It was coming from my wet coat hanging behind the stove. My father discovered that my lucky puck was a flattened horse "poop" and he wasn't very pleased. Needless to say, I never brought home any more lucky pucks.
True story, as kids see it
Betty Pye was frantically trying to get her four-year old ready for church. She said, "Hurry up, we are going to be late and God wouldn't be happy." After much ado, they arrived at church. They waited 10 minutes or so before the priest arrived. As the priest entered the church, her son have his mother a tug and then politely said, "I can't believe it. Even Jesus is late for church."
The not-so unbreakable drinking glasses
Oliver and I were married on Bell Island N.L, Sept. 14, 1950 and looked forward to our first Christmas together.
One of our many gifts were eight beautiful unbreakable drinking glasses.
During one of our Christmas parties, everyone had fun throwing these at the walls and on the floor. They really were unbreakable.
the following morning we overslept and Oliver didnâÂÂt have time to light our living room âÂÂwood and coalâÂÂ stove, before leaving for the office. So I closed the two doors leading to the room.
later that morning my sister-in-law Eveline came for a visit. she wanted to see our Christmas tree and gifts.
I explained how cold the living room was with no hear, but she insisted on going in anyway.
Soon after I showed Eveline our gifts, I threw one of our unbreakable drinking glasses at the wall. It shattered as it hit.
Wveline looked at me and said âÂÂAre you cracking up MurielâÂÂ? I was laughing so hard I couldnâÂÂt explain what had happened.
Apparently the drinking glasses shattered because it was so cold.
From that day on, I thought that Eveline looked at me as not being quite normal.
My Nephew Trevor lives in Rocky Hr. so in the winter they usually have a lot of snow. Trevor brought a new shovel with a steel edge, to help with the snow clearing. After purchasing his shovel he waited for the first snowfall. Finally it came and he started out eagerly to try it out. First thing he did was went down to clear out his truck and the shovel hit the side of the truck scraping the side. Then he went up to his shed to shovel that out and the shovel hit the shed door and broke the glass. He then went to clear away his son's skidoo and shovel stuck the vinyl and tore a hole in it. By this time he was getting pretty fed up so decided enough is enough, he went down around the side of his to get a arm full of wood. When he took the corner of his house he slipped on the ice and went down and stuck his elbow, that wasn't so bad.....Until down came the shovel and stuck him across the nose and busted it open. Last sighting the shovel was sailing out in Bonne Bay.
My first-grade daughter is very intelligent and beyond her grade level. She is a very good reader and catches on very quickly. She loves school and enjoys learning new things. She was just getting used to using titles prefixing the surname of teachers at school.
Many teachers were amazed with her spelling capabilities. During recess, her homeroom teacher was talking with her and began asking her to spell random words. She asked her to spell "Mississippi", knowing oodles of people had gotten that one incorrect. With a very serious and confident look my daughter answered with "M-R-S dot space S-I-P-P-Y."
Hope you like my funny true story that happened on Bell Island, NL in 1955:
My husband Oliver decided to buy electric clippers so that he could cut our two young son's hair to save money. So then I decided to save even more money by cutting Oliver's hair.
I was listening to 'Hockey Night in Canada' on our radio while trying out my barbering skills for the first time. Just as my favourite team scored the winning goal, I ran the clippers from Oliver's neck to the top of his head.
I laughed so hard that I could only point at my mistake. As I was seven months pregnant, I thought I would go into labour!
It must have been well past midnight when I finished Oliver'Âs haircut, trying to make him presentable for the office the next day.
That was my first and last attempt at barbering.
Muriel White (retired RN)
Mrs. Oliver J. White