Reveal the hilarious things that have happened in your life, and let us all have a chuckle with you!
Baby vs. Cat
We had just brought home our newest member of the family, a healthy baby girl. After maybe a couple of weeks or so we noticed that she had been sneezing quite a bit. A crowd of us were sitting around the table chatting and someone brought up the fact that she may be allergic to the cat, whom we had for six years. My son, who had just turned 8, said, "well, we better get rid of the baby, we had the cat first."
Bee Nest in the Eaves
Some time ago when my son Andrew was six years old, he stood at the base of a ladder in our front yard "helping" me determine the cause of our clogged eavestrough. As I attempted to clear debris out of the trough I was suddenly swarmed by wasps! During my quick descent, I shouted to Andrew to, "RUN, I found a bee nest!" Startled, Andrew ran to the sidewalk waving his arms in a panic and loudly announced to all the flabbergasted neighbours that "my dad found a penis on the roof, my found a penis on the roof!"
Don Cashin Hamilton, Ontario but belongs to Corner Brook
(4.67 rating, 3 votes)
Santa's Keys
To ensure "his" arrival - our delightful son decided to send our house keys to the North Pole so Santa will not be locked out. Thankfully, it was the post office drop box and the keys could be retrieved!
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Lesson Learned
In attempting to teach my four-year-old daughter the dangers of strangers, I mentioned that, in addition to not talking to strangers, she should be aware that they may try different ways of attempting to "hurt" her. I told her the "bad person" ... click to read moreIn attempting to teach my four-year-old daughter the dangers of strangers, I mentioned that, in addition to not talking to strangers, she should be aware that they may try different ways of attempting to "hurt" her. I told her the "bad person" may ask her to help find their dog. If they did, she is to yell "No!" and run the other way. If they follow or touch her, she is allowed to start shouting bad words. When reviewing this lesson with her, I asked what she'd do if someone she doesn't know asks her to help find their dog. She replied, "I'll say, 'Find your own damned dog!'"
Poison Tea
Growing up in Conception Bay, Mom and the older sisters weeded the vegetables on Saturdays. This particular Saturday, around three o'clock, Mom wanted a snack. I was chosen to go home and get tea and molasses bread. I found an empty Crush bottle in the pantry, rinsed it out, and put the tea in it. Mom enjoyed the snack, but got sick afterwards.
The girls told Dad what had happened at suppertime. When the Crush bottle was mentioned, Dad, looking pale, jumped off his chair and went to the pantry. He returned shortly after and said, "I had poison in that bottle for the cabbage grubs."
If I hadn't rinsed out the bottle, I wonder what might have happened to Mom?
Pat Duggan Southern Shore, NL
(0 rating, 0 votes)
Having a Beef With Mom My mom had a way with words.
Shortly after arriving in Halifax, I came home one day to find my mom in a terrible state. "What's wrong, Mom?" "Me son, I've done it this time. I should never have left Garnish." "Why not?" I asked. "Well, you knows how the small kids in the area comes in to play with our youngsters?" "Yes; what happened?" "Well, my son, one of their mothers called and ... click to read moreMy mom had a way with words.
Shortly after arriving in Halifax, I came home one day to find my mom in a terrible state. "What's wrong, Mom?" "Me son, I've done it this time. I should never have left Garnish." "Why not?" I asked. "Well, you knows how the small kids in the area comes in to play with our youngsters?" "Yes; what happened?" "Well, my son, one of their mothers called and asked if Tim and Tom was here; I said 'yes, they're about to leave,' I also told the lady that called that I was giving them a drop of liquor before they go home. The phone went dead, and the next thing I know the lady is coming in the door; me son, she was some red. Gathering up her kids, she called I right down to the lowest. She was going out the door with them before I had the chance to tell her."
"I'm having CARN BEEF and CABBAGE for supper and that's where the liquor come from, I yelled as she left."
I'se the B'y
It was bedtime and my daughter was laying in bed with Lily, my three-year-old granddaughter, when Lily decided she wanted to play a game. My daughter said, "Ok, which one?" Lily replied, "I'se the B'y something that is...blue." Now that is a true Newfie!
